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Sarcasm CornerJune 5, 2008 Lists have been made, emails have been sent and I am spreading the word. I'm all about self promotion in theory, but in practice I get shy. Me and my laptop suffer from self-promotional anxiety. So I need to get over myself and tell more people. Meet more people. Know more people. It's like campaigning for presidency. Vote for Little Monkey! May 29, 2008 I've been asking about the 'next step' for a while, sometimes to myself, sometimes to the universe, sometimes out loud to friends and colleagues. Where do I go from here? For the past months I've been craving progress. I kind of thought it was tax season - so little to show for so much work - but I'm sure that's only true to a degree. For three years I have built up my skills so that I know every actor on the red carpet. It didn't start that way, but recently I've felt very comfortable in those skills. So what do i do? I ask for a shake-up.
I have a good cry inside of me that needs to get out. I'm not sad or anything, I'm just noticing that I'm getting emotional for no reason whatsoever which means I have 1. not exercised 2. not slept 3. not eaten. We'll I've eaten plenty and slept ok, so I guess we have the answer to that one. Anyway, it's convenient that Idol Gives Back was on last night and I can bawl in the privacy of my living room all morning. Phew, dodged that bullet. Who the hell wants to exercise? April 4, 2008 - 2nd blog See, when I'm at it I go all out. I just wanted to add that the reason I'm no longer updating my clips is because you reallly don't need to read my news stories on a weekly basis. I have a few features that I should post, one with Hill Harper and a one oage item on CSI's return, but gerenally it's all been short, sweet and steady for the past months. Once MarkyMark slows down a little (so maybe next year) we'll take my expert clips and put them online as well. It's just taking a little time. We'll get there. April 4, 2008 Blogging seems harder and harder these days. The ideas are there. Someone will cut me off in traffic andI'm ready to write about it, but as soon as I get to my computer I am overconsumed by other things. Assignments, emails, social engagements. I forget what I wanted to talk about. And life is FLYING by. It's only two or three weeks since I last blogged but it feels like I did my KTLA appearance six months ago. I just told someone I went to a wedding last November. It was in February. I just can't distunguish onepast month from another. March 15, 2008 I have been so slack lately and it's really just because I first worked so hard, then spent a month hanging out with Luisa, one of my Best Friends in the whole world, and then - it being my birthday, and all - I took it a little easier for a week. Now it's probably just going to get back to its usual madness, but here is a little KTLA news clip that was on TV last Friday. Do I look like a muppet? Dunno. Judge for yourself! Click Here
February 10, 2008 I am inside the Grammy press room, and despite the fact that I am working it's the most time I've had to think in weeks. They asked us to arrive five hours early, and while I grumbled I have managed to respond to every pending email, written a column, brushed up on all the latest news in pop culture and now - brace yourselves - I even have time to write a blog entry. February 2, 2008 When I was 10 my parents had me audition for the Music Conservatory. My dad had promised me an ALF doll if I did it, because -as with everything parents wanted me to do- I was reluctant. Actually I wasn't reluctant. I was petrified. Why would someone want to put me in a situation where I would without any doubt fail miserably? They clearly had more faith in my musical abilities than I did, but let's be realistic -The Conservatory? January 3, 2008 It's a year since I decided to leave my steady job and become a freelance writer. It definitely wasn't the easiest of years, with the most sound sleep, or the most nurtured relationships, but this certainly wasn't for lack of work. I don't think I have ever in my life worked so hard, but felt so accomplished and like what I was doing truly was for me. All success was my success. 1 - Buy new calendar for 2007 (did it - this year I'm going electronic) December 16th, 2007 Ok, this is not quite how I should be spending my Sunday night when I have a ton of work to do, but it was just such a crazy, crazy night in Hollywood that I have to share. I was covering the Satellite Awards and I get a ticket that says Bruce Davison's Guest. So I'm like, ok, well, at least the view will be nice. I sit down, talk about ...whatever, Finland, where I'm from, what I do, I don't know, the usual nervous Carita show and about 30 minutes into it I discover I am discussing my life with the editor of An Inconvenient Truth and Sicko. And sitting opposite of Bruce Davison, joking about how he doesn't give me enough Knight Rider scoop. November 27th, 2007 So, we're back from Japan. It's strange that when you're away from home the first thing you notice is how crowded places are, and how smoky rooms smell, but as soon as you return to the comfort of your home you miss your trip and all that came with it. November 4th, 2007 Starstruck by McDreamy. Didn't think it could happen anymore, because I feel like I've spoken to almost every person to ever have been on TV at this point - as well as Michelle Pfeiffer and Claire Danes, but boy was I wrong. I mean, seriously, (seriously) I was sitting on a balcony at the Beverly Hilton, looking at Patrick Dempsey, talking about his movie, when the question that I had in my turtle brain just disappeared. And I went "Uhh..I just lost my train of thought completely" and then we talked about Grey's Anatomy instead, because even in my most nervous state I can still ask questions about that show. I probably could be comatose and still perk up at the thought of Grey's Scoop. Check out TV Guide.com today. There just could be something there... October 28th, 2007 Time for a brief update. Back in LA after a week in Hawaii, where the hubby and I swam with turtles, hiked ten miles in the rain forest and enjoyed more sushi than my belly thought it could handle. It was a much needed break from work, life, phones, computers, emails, everything. I was supposed to blog about my freelancing, at least that was the original intent of the Sarcasm Corner, yet I've managed to dance around my working habits out of a fear that my clients might tune in and read something they didn't want to see, not unlike photos of drunken people on MySpace are a turnoff for any future employer. September 21th, 2007 I obsess. I obsess about food, I obsess about work, I self impose stress and I suffer the consequences. For the past month I've pretty much been eating cardboard and grass (oatmeal and salad). With modest results, may I add. But then another unplanned element kicked in - yes, stress and lack of sleep, and presto. But I'm thinking this diet thing is over. Everything in moderation. Besides, I miss my Del Taco. September 18th, 2007 I always get so excited by the bigger events that the deflated feeling that follows is sort of inevtiable. Sunday was the Emmys, the Saturday before the Creative Arts Emmys. Both involve getting dolled up, wearing your long gown and mentally preparing for the hottest people in show business to talk to you. And it pretty much plays out that way, save for a few minor details. September 5th, 2007 So it's a little obsessive...I'm eating rye bread and oatmeal and vegetables...only, in hope of losing five pounds I've gained over the summer. Water retention, says my husband. Yeah. Maybe a pound and a half. The rest is pasta, wine, Chinese food, wine, Mexican food, wine...and maybe more wine? So now I 'm eating food that tastes like cardboard. Good times. August 15th, 2007 My husband and I had an interesting conversation last night as we celebrated the remains of our anniversary. I was asking what he thought of my interview with David Duchovny and he said,
August 13th, 2007 I am really supposed to be writing an article right now. Really, really, really. BUT, I'm updating my blog, so...so much for that. I have so much to share, though! Like interviews with Claire Danes, Michelle Pfeiffer, David Duchovny, the Weeds peeps. August 6th, 2007 Blogging every three days?...Well, I tried. The latter half of July I might as well have scratched off my social calendar because frankly, if you saw me it was either at a party or in pajamas. But it did include certain highlights like David Duchovny's dog humping my leg, getting 11 items posted, getting my first two-page article published (well, next week) and banking many many many assignments. July 16th, 2007 - 2nd post Stupid Carlita. She had an entire interview with Medium's Sofia Vassilieva posted on TV Guide.com, and didn't even know about it. July 16th, 2007 This is such a great month for me. In fact, as days go, today is pretty darn good. If you go to Hollywod.com's TV tab, three out of the top four are my stories, and despite my byline getting a bit messed up (Carlita??) I have two stories on TV Guide.com. This month I am living, eating and breathing TV. And I am loving it. July 8th, 2007 Unstoppable! That's what my blogging is on this weekend when I should be writing for money!! But check out my second on-camera piece. Unlike last time, when you couldn't distinguish my nose from the rest of my pasty face, this time you can see the whole thing. Nose, cheeks, everything. The place is Hollywood.com July 7th, 2007 Life does funny things to you sometimes.
June 23rd, 2007 Oh my gosh, it's been so long I don't know where to start. We just got back from New York last Wednesday where we spent a lovely week with my in-laws and the rest of my husband's family. I never really thought a person could have two homes, but now I know I do. June 11th, 2007 Why am I a little monkey? Because only little monkeys fall down the stairs when they're about to interview someone. Only little monkeys manage to erase their entire hard drive. Only little monkeys start driving without writing down the street number. I'd like to think I have a good head on my shoulders, but sometimes there's a Charlie Chaplin just dying to come out. A few weeks ago I had a phone interview with a TV actor. As the phone ran I picked it up, but before I managed to answer it the battery died. I got out of the chair, tried to run down every second stair, fell - scratched the skin off my wrist, which now looks like a failed suicide attempt - and got to the phone. It had stopped ringing, but I dialed the number, appologized profusely, and got on with it. Then, four minutes into the interview, I accidentally hung up. At this point I just want to die. Thankfully the person I interviewed was very nice about it, and hopefully found it a bit amusing. The next time we meet I'll show my war wound. It's ridiculously ugly. And yes, then there is the case of the vanishing hard drive, which is my excuse for not writing for a while. I'm desperately trying to remember passwords and keywords and where in God's name I keep registration numbers. Only a little monkey would do something that silly. Don't you think? BTW, check out my exclusive interview with Jeffrey Dean Morgan. It ain't much, but it's as close to Isaiah Washington as I can get right now.
May 18th, 2007 I'm a proud Finn. I love the thought of a window seat on a quiet bus where I can lean my forehead against the window and stare into the darkness of an early summer night without having to speak to anyone. I love walking through the center of Helsinki passing the same people over an over. I happily accept Finland coming in at 17th in any contest, if only Sweden receives 3 points less. I love the peace, the quiet, the realism and the loyalty. I love that you can't avoid real news, only because there is nothing else on television. I also love that Finns are a week behind on American Idol, but end up downloading it anyway. I love that I'm singing songs in languages I don't understand just because they participated in the Eurovision Song Contest and I can't get them out of my head. I'm happy to be back, but even happier to have been home. Sometimes that's all a girl needs to tackle life with new energy. April 29th, 2007 I need to go home for a while. It's not that I don't love what I do, or appreciate my life, I just need to get away from it all for a while. I need to go a place where people know me, remember what I was like before marriage, before LA, before weekends and workdays started blurring into one big mess. I need to remember what other people think of as priorities. I need to empty a few bottles of wine in the company of friends who speak funny foreign languages. I need to dance to cheesy pop music. I need to recycle a few newspapers and feel like they actually get recycled. I feel like it's hard to think in LA. There is no time or space for thought. There is little food for thought. You just go, like an energizer bunny on speed. Once I've gathered my thoughts, I'll come back, and I know I'll fall in love with Hollywood again. It's inevitable. What fantasy life doesn't have a happy ending? April 26th, 2007 This has been a crazy month, so I appologize for not blogging. I have been to the Heroes wrap party, which turned into 16 pages of material. Guess all that working out to Heroes had other benefits than a pretty butt after all. I've interviewed a Modern Witch, the lovely Fiona Horne, who's also set me up with Take Home Chef Curtis Stone. I'm now in Miami for the Latin Billboard Awards, but not as a reporter - as a teamster. AND I spent last weekend in Palm Springs exercising. Me...Yeah, I know. I coulnd't believe it either. As soon as I'm back home again I will scan the material and put it on the Monkeynews. But keep your eyes out for the online video piece on Fiona. I'll let you know as soon as it's up, but go to Hollywood.com when you have a minute. I could be there anyday now. On Monday I am off to Finland for two weeks. Hurraaaaaaaayyyy!!!!! I probably won't write a lot, but I'll try. April 9th, 2007 This is how gossip is born. A week ago I asked Lindsay Lohan on a red carpet who she would play if she could portray a historical person. She said that she would love to play Princess Diana or Grace Kelly because they gave so much back to the people. In Touch used the quote. Good for them, it seemed to fit in somewhere, besides - we were all on that carpet just trying to get as much info as we could. But today I read in a Finnish magazine, who picked up that quote from In Touch, that Lindsay has been pegged to portray Princess Di, but there is no information yet about the movie itself. C'mon!! Of course there's no info about the movie. There is no movie. But it's amazing how good news, and above all, important news travels fast. March 27th, 2007 Ok, I write a blog that I promised to update every three days, mainly so that my parents could see that I was working and not just watching TV all day. (Luckily I get paid to watch TV all day). I find every three days quite the commitment, but yesterday I met Michael who runs the fabulous Popbytes.com and since checking out his website at 9pm and again at 10pm and once again at 10.35pm, he's already updated it FOUR times. You rock, dude. We met at the premiere for The Tudors, a new show for Showtime, where we were both caught of guard by Jonathan Rhys Meyers intensity and the fact that Lindsay Lohan actually showed up. I'm going to get a pic of the hottest Henry VIII in history, and post it soon. In the meantime, if you like pop culture, check out popbytes!
March 26th, 2007 See, I didn't abandon you. How could I abandon you? My first feature is up on Hollywood.com! It's a piece on Disney's Digital 3-D, and how they're bringing their new film Meet the Robinsons to almost 700 screens. Hopefully it's only the beginning. Hugs. March 20th, 2007 Ok, some resolutions have gone to s*#t. 1. Haven't reaaaaally sent out pitches for every day I didn't work. But saying that, I've done ok so far. As much as I love reporting I just need to start focusing more on the writing itself. NOW, saying that, check out those interviews with Jeff Goldblum and Laura Prepon. Not bad, eh? March 14th, 2007 When I first got my car I was sitting at a red light when the car to my left though this would be the best time to change lanes. He popped my bumper, and I cried. The following year I was driving on a side street in Hollywood when I noticed an illegally parked car. I managed to stop, but suddenly the parked car was in my lap as the car behind me failed to stop and pushed me in. My car looked like an accordian and I cried. My car window has shattered in my face for no reason. My car has been egged...twice. Had a milkshake thrown on it (and not just by the leftover shake, but the whole damn malted chocolate pint). I cursed and I screamed. Today I tried to pass a truck and heard how the corner of his steel deck scraped a big gaping hole in my car. Then I heard the window shatter into a million little pieces. I drove to the Beverly Hilton, parked my car, interviewed 16 energetic tweens, and made believe that everything was dandy. Then I broke down in hysterical tears in front of the guy at the body shop. Am I a retard? Possibly. Probably. Should I be allowed to drive at all? If this is not some higher power saying "Take the buss, bitch", I don't know what is. But you know what, I CAN'T take the bus. I CAN'T stop driving. I don't care how much of a retard I am, I have to keep driving. So you can me cry, you can make me scream and you can make me feel like an idiot, but you can't make me take the f****g buss! So there.
March 1st, 2007 Oh My, oh my. Oh. My. It's been a long week. The Oscars are like the New Years Eve of the entertainment year for all reporters. It marks the end of award season, of "the best of 2006" and makes way for everything good in 2007. Of course that means work, and a lot of it. So I covered luxury lounges, pre-parties, post-parties and a viewing party. Stress, redcarpet spats, fatigue...Stayed up till 4am every morning, filing (procrastinating) (watching Ice Princess) (You gotta wonder who scheduled that movie at 3.30am...) But now it's over. How did I do? No idea. But it's not like there isn't work after the Oscars. I'm already booking March. Something really exciting and weird happened. E! Online liked my test report and wants me to do a weekly Vegas report for their show Planet Gossip, which is on their website. I've never done on camera stuff, and I certainly didn't think they'd like it. But they did. So here goes nothing! Oh, and when it comes to my writing, I take critique quite well because I've practiced for almost 7 years. When it comes to this I'm super super sensitive. So please tell me exactly what you think I can do better, but preface it with "You did really well, but..." Thanks! February 20th, 2007 Ah, upwards, and onwards to happier things. Check out the interview with Mariska Hargitay that took place last week. It's my first interview for Hollywood.com, but hopefully not the last! February 19th, 2007I don't usually comment on celebrities, out of fear that I'll one day get to interview them, but by now I think Britney Spears will be forever out of my league, so here goes. I'm slightly ashamed to admit that I've always had an obsession with Britney Spears. When she was doing back flips to "One More Time" I wanted her belly button. I did the silly "Oops..." -dance at work. I thought she was a kick ass dancer, and an amazing performer. I was disappointed when she married K-Fed and started having babies when "I'm not a girl, not yet a woman" should still have been the number one song on her iPod. What she's going through is inevitable, I guess. I'm not surprised. But I am worried, because I can't think of one celebrity who has suffered a nervous breakdown and later returned to super power. I think it's over for Britney. And she's 25 years old. And as much as I shouldn't care -and sincerely hope I'm wrong- I'm afraid that we'll wake up one morning to another Anna Nicole-like news story. It never occurred to me that she was a real person, because she was never really treated as such, nor did she behave like one. I think it's time for Brit to find a quiet spot in Louisiana to grow her hair back and think about a plan B. Super market clerk doesn't sound so bad, yeah? February 17th, 2007It wasn't one of the best nights of my life, by way of material gathering, but for the sake of impressing my brother, and Ellie and Chewie, here are a few pics from Thursday night. If this is not a moment from Entourage, I don't know what is.
And credit, where credit is due. Thank you Billy Bautista of MySpace for taking the photos that make us all look angelic. Hug it out, bitch.February 16th, 2007I am pacing. Pacing like I've had 17 cups of coffee. Pacing like I have forgotten to do something. Pacing like I'm going crazy. I'm trying to get things done. A million little things. Transcribing, editing, filming, pick-ups, cleaning - the house needs cleaning. I pick things up around the house. Not enough to make a difference. What can I do? Check email. Check email again. For another job, another reason to sit down and focus. If even for three minutes. I need to focus. I did a test piece for E! Online. It was mortifying. I'm all by myself, so I get to be the only person mortified. I spend the first hour looking at my nose, my chin, my funny eyes. I add make up, remove make up, do anything to make me seem less like a cartoon, more like a person. The next hour I ramble. Ramble into a digital camera that seems to shut down or run out of battery every time I think I remember what I'm supposed to talk about for a minute. I look like those dog post cards where all you see is a nose, and a little bit of dog behind it. Can't focus. Start speaking and the lawn mower guy starts up this sound that might as well be a space rocket in my front yard. It is one minute and I can't get it filmed. The Gods don't want me to. I make funny faces and sounds. Why is this so difficult? I come home from a job convinced that I got nothing. Listen to the material. It's not nothing. It's something. I just want to be better. I want everything. I want focus. Better check my email one more time. February 12th, 2007The mind is willing but the body says "No, f-ing way". I am now done with the Grammys, and the pre-parties, the post-parties, the whole lot, and as fun as it was my pending flu is now determined to take over my body. I know where it all stems from. I get back from DC and think "Ah, I'm back in the tropics" and right as I'm talking to Amy Brenneman about her favorite TV shows and Maggie Grace about her theories on LOST in my cute little top and open toe shoes it happens. LA is not that warm. Not in February at least. So I've been fighting off a little bit of sore throat, a little bit of sniffles. Painting on a pretty face with a healthy glow and now that the most hectic part is over my body has finally given in to the pressure. It seems that this time it's even more than light diffusing make-up can handle. At this point I think it's worth it. Pushing myself to the limit to see what I can accomplish. Getting off a plane and going straight to an event. Sleeping for three hours here and there. I think it's worth the exhaustion, just to feel that kick of adrenaline as stars align and you get what you set out to get. But for how long? How far will foundation take you in the end? February 7th, 2007Wed - Fly to DC. It's cold. Get to hotel after Super Shuttle ass picks up his girlfriend on the way. Watch Lost on iPod until battery dies. February 1st, 2007Blondie goes psycho. I'm in DC, which is cold, cold, cold, and I'm sitting inside the hotel convincing myself I have a million things to do on my computer that're keeping me from going outdoors. I'm also recovering from a weird night. You know when dreams spill over into real life? I wake up in the middle of the night convinced I have left some really important green fabric in California that means the difference between me ever working again and being an unemployed, pamaja clad outcast for the rest of my life. I have no idea what that was about, but man, it was weird. So, I take it I'm a little stressed about something, or all that LOST watching is finally affecting my brain. (I'm now up to Season 2, episode 9.) BUT, it has now been proven that someone reads my blog. I hereby share my first round-up answers with you, courtesy of Shauna, 26: What motivates you to work out? January 28th, 2007Roundups. They're questions that you ask a bunch of celebrities so that their picture can be published next to their quote on how much they love pilates. Now, because I feel like it, I'm going to ask and answer some roundups myself. And if you have a minute and you want to be part of my blog, answer some yourself and I'll put them up here, right next to my answers! What motivates you to work out? Have you taken a great road trip? If you had a super power, what would it be? What are your favorite TV shows? What's your favorite make up? What's your guilty pleasure? So c'mon, what are your answers? Be part of the Monkey News. January 19th, 2007I'm not hugely fond of children. In fact, I probably don't like your child. Oh, get over it. I'm not so sure you'd like your child either, if it wasn't yours. I've never thought I'd be a particularly patient mother, when I have very little patience for adults. I don't think I could show interest in their drawings and singing and swimming and gymnastics and poems and essays day after day, year after year. I don't think it's in me. I also know that teenagers scare the crap out of me, and if I ever were a parent, I'd like my children to come out at and be...24 years old. Give or take a few months. This is not a blog entry where I say "But THEN I read this book and everything changed". No, this is a blog entry that says, then I read this book about being pregnant and I thought it was hilarious. Risa Green (who said I was smart, BTW) wrote a book about a character who didn't really want a kid, but didn't really not want one either. So she gets pregnant, and she pretty much hates every second of it. And now Risa is the mother of two. How does that happen? How? Well, I interviewed her, and she actually gave me some straight answers. It's the first time I have ever spoken to a parent who is not giving me that patronizing "You can't understand until you've experienced it, dear" song and dance. I'd love to say I understand parenting better. I don't. But if anything, Risa made me realize that just like with anything else, you can be honest about children not being so great 100% of the time. So, anyway, read the interview. You might find it interesting, too. January 17th, 2007Ok, I know I haven't blogged in a week, but I can make it up to you. I promise. The next day it was time for the Golden Globes, hailed as the most relaxed and most fun of the award shows because celebs get to eat and drink during the ceremony. For me it wasn't very relaxing. I was up at 9, left the house at 10.30, got my credentials at the hotel, sat around for an hour and a half, and then got out on the red carpet in my red dress. It was freezing. When water freezes in LA you know there's trouble. And when not even the Rivers stop to give interviews, you know it's going to be a great carpet. But the print outlets came together, and managed to lure a few people to them. We even got a few heroes, Shonda Rhimes, uhh..Mario Lopez. Good times. Then it was time for the press room, which you can read all about here. The only thing I have to say is, I can't believe he said it. If anyone has followed the Grey's rift, you know what I'm talking about. I just really can't believe he said it out loud. Into a microphone, in the press room of the Golden Globes. I also couldn't believe a lot of the questions asked inside the press room. Once you get used to the banter that takes place on the red carpet it feels very strange to hear questions like "Do you enjoy the fact that men's careers last longer then women's?" What?? What! Eddie Murphy didn't quite understand that either. Or enjoy it. Then I covered the InStyle after party, which was fabulous for everyone who could celebrate, and less fabulous for those trying to catch a quote or a glimpse of the people celebrating. But all in all, it was an unforgettable night. After which I got another 3.5 hours of sleep. Then I got up to interview Irina Björklund, for VOLT, which was a fun experience. She's such a lovely, giggly girl. She even sang a bit of her first song for me over lattes and sauteed spinach. The interview comes out next Saturday, so if you get VOLT, don't miss it. And please read the interview with Christy Carlson Romano on Savvy Miss, because she is so...grown up and inspirational. Here she's driving her car, while putting on make-up and talking to her financial advisor, and I knock over a table just trying to get up to greet her. Cool, calm, collected. Tonight I have the NBC All Star Party and tomorrow I'm getting fingerprinted. Please let nothing go wrong today. I don't have the energy to deal with Murphy's Law. January 9th, 2007For three years I drove 50 miles a day. That's 250 miles a week. This and last week combined I've driven 145 miles. And none of it has been in stop and go traffic. Can this freelancing thing get any better? I've been on the phone and the computer for two days now setting up the next week and a half, which are going to be chaos. I have articles due, events every day, The Golden Globes on Monday, and I'm trying to do everything I can to just set it up right so all I have to do is type and send. Oh, and THINK. People are paying me to think. That one's harder to set up. Better get crackin'. By the way, next week, if I start flaking on the blog, I should have two new articles on Savvy Miss. One is an interview with Christy Carlson Romano, possibly the sweetest 22 year old Emmy nominated actress/author/singer in the world. Hugs to you. And the other interview is one of my absolute favorites from last year with author Risa Green. We had a long chat about having kids. Why, why not, how, and what the hell happens to everyone who has one. So check those out. I'll provide links as soon as I have them!! January 6th, 2007I'm really just writing to keep my New Years Resolution. The only remotely exciting thing that's happened - well, actually, this is exciting - is that we received a new HDTV and we got the HD box and cables and everything and it's the coolest TV ever. But our VCR broke, despite the fact (or because of the fact?) that we hadn't touched it in three months. And our DVD player was already busted. And now I'm waiting for cables to connect the laptop to the TV so I can watch season 1 of LOST, since I'm the only person in the world who has never watched an entire episode. That's a lie, I watched one yesterday on my laptop. It's good. Who knew? As for other resolutions, well...Worked on a story on Thursday and Friday, so didn't work out at the gym. Spent most of those days on the phone, or checking email, setting up the next couple of weeks, when the blogging resolution will undoubtedly go. Haven't signed up for extra work because my green card expires and I have to go get finger printed again, in case I've committed a felony in the past two years. When would I have had any time to commit crime??? Maybe between issuing entry permits to foreigners at the Consulate General of Finland, translating for Disney, doing red carpet reporting for TV Guide and editing for Savvy Miss, I took some time out to rob a bank. Because the three hours I had set aside for sleep were just too much. Who needs sleep anyway? Oh, and I have moisturized half heartedly. January 3rd, 2007Spinning. January 1st, 2007It's a New Year and so far mine has started rather well. Booked my first job (the Golden Globes), saw a funny movie (Night at the Museum), kept my resolutions (bought calendar, moisturized, haven't taken trash out yet.) Now all I have to do is figure out a game plan. I'm wondering if I should shell out the 20 bucks a month to make 100. Sounds like a no-brainer, right? Well, it's not. That's for extra work. Then there's the "should I pay for freelance resources?" question. I don't know. I really don't. Confused monkey. Today I'm full of all these wonderful ideas for articles, but who knows what the situation is like next Friday. Maybe I'll be all out by then? Another setback was the Taye Diggs interview I did last November. It was a lovely interview (I mean, it's Taye Diggs, how could it not be?) But ABC has canceled his show so I'm guessing that the interview won't be published now. I could be wrong. But I'm probably not. And it was a good interview, too. Bugger. Oh well, I have the experience of having lunch with Taye Diggs, and that ain't all that bad. Moving on. December 27thOk, time for New Year's resolutions. Bettering yourself for no other reason than one calendar ends and another blank one begins. That reminds me;
December 22nd, 2006It's the end of another year, and true to my nature I ended this one with a bang. Hey, who needs a steady job when you can be unemployed under a euphemism? Clearly, I don't :) I left Finland three and a half years ago, and although many saw the LA in me, I never thought I'd be able to settle in the way I have. I spent my first two years here crying, which is the longest I've cried in any location (In fact, I've never lived anywhere for more than 6 months at a time since I was 19.) But when I stopped bawling, things took off. In January 2006 I did my first Television Critics Association Tour and I was crapping my p
It was the first time I got to meet other journalists in LA. I had been bored, mostly, by the people around me, and felt that I had nothing in common with them. If I had to say "Oh My God, that's so cute" one more time I thought my last brain cell would evaporate and that would be the end of me. Turns out I just hadn't met the sarcastic bastards that make me feel like myself. These people have been the highlight of many events - the Academy Awards, the TCAs, and many a red carpet. I will never be Giselle Bundchen's best friend, but I will always have clever banter with my fellow reporters. 
I have the best friends a girl can have, which was proven to me yet again as I received a book from my bachelorette party in 2004 as my Christmas present. (Better late than never.) Although, most of you were drunk, and I couldn't make out everything. Let's assume that what you said was nice. I am so proud of every person I can call my friend. You're the people changing the world, running around the halls of the UN, globetrotting, making choices in life that are best for you, and I am in awe of each and every one of you. Before I start dripping like a sap tree, I'll end this entry. Have a Merry Christmas, and tune in for my year of Freelance Writing! Mwah. Carita September 28thI'm a product junkie. I walk through stores and feel a burning desire to buy shampoo that will make my hair shiny, moisturiser that will make my skin glow and vitamins that will make me clever. I promised myself I wouldn't buy anything new until I'd finished every moisturizer, conditioner and soap. And it's driving me crazy. I feel like it's a race against time. How fast can I get rid of what I have? I don't know what these new products can bring to my life that I don't already have. But I'm convinced they make me better. We all have our weaknesses. Is mine really moisturizer? September 20thHello, my fellow Finns! Have you noticed that there's a Jennifer Love Hewitt interview up on Stara.fi? Yup, yours truly met the tiny little actress, and we talked about her new show. Just go to Celebrity Interviews and there it is, along with Wilmer and Eva. I have another interesting project going on, and as soon as it's done and published, I'll share the highlights of that adventure. September 13th, 2006A week ago I saw a James Brown concert at the Hollywood Bowl. I sat under the stars and though "Holy crap, I am living my dream!" Great marriage, great jobs, great friends, great concert, great everything. I am writing for a living. That was the unobtainable goal, which is now obtained. And the scary part? I don't even want to set new goals. Not for a while. Of course living a dream still means living, and facing daily struggles that don't come with the Dream Manual. But I'll take it all. Throw more at me. I'm good to go. July 30th, 2006Welcome to Sarcasm Corner, the new home of my blog. For those of you who have missed The Monkey News, I promise we're back for good. I bet some of you thought Sarcasm Corner was dead. Not so, my friends. Not so. Sarcasm Corner is alive and well. And my website finally has everything you needed to know about the monkey and more. I hope you find the new website interesting. And if you can't say anything nice...well, it is Sarcasm Corner, so why don't you drop me a line anyway. May 20th, 2006WE WON!!!!!! WE WON !!!!!! I mean can you believe it? Finland WON the Eurovision Song Contest with record breaking numbers!! They said it could never be done! Finns threatened to leave the country because they were so ashamed of the band!!!! Non-believers! OH MY GOD!!!!! LORDI won the Eurovision Song contest and do you know who is going to Finland in May next year??? You bet your bottom I will! I am so proud right now. Well done Lordi! Jag säger bara Halleluja! Me vittu voitettiin...Hienosti tehty! Yle - jag vill så vara med nästa år!!!!
May 18th, 2006My first SavvyMiss article is out! Check out Relocating For Love
May 8th, 2006It's a big week for a little monkey! First of all Savvy Miss launched and we are all so happy! You need to see this website if you're a woman who has been dying for some intelligent content for super smart but fun women! Click here to be transported. Also, my interview with Eva Longoria is on Stara.fi - sorry for all y'all who don't speak Finnish! Click here for the sexiest Housewife in showbiz. There is plenty more to come. Just sit tight. The countdown to a new website has begun. Mwah
April 18th, 2006I can't believe what I just said. "Yeah, 16 years ago it was a lovely school!" 16 years ago? Am I so old that I can use terminology like "16 years ago"? It's 8 years since I graduated high school. I graduated college 5 years ago. I was seven years older than our waitress at Hooters. (Now, that's a whole other story...) I still feel like I'm 17 years old. Okay, maybe 21. I remember
21 really well. I don't remember more than the specifics of 22-26.
Probably because I'm still living it. Husband, LA, government job...all
that good stuff. Wait a minute. I'm not 26. I'm 27.
April 11th, 2006When a red carpet is bad you want to spontaneously combust. You want to pull hair, your own as well as other people's. You want to scream "Your love life is not that interesting!" and "How hard is it for you to stop and tell me you're 'Like, so excited!'??? How hard?". It is Glamour Hell. But when a carpet is good it's the closest you can come to a symbiotic relationship with a celeb. You want to hug everyone because they're giving you a piece of their funniest, most interesting side. And guess what? Everyone feels like they did something worthwhile. No one contributed to nasty rumours about how impossible they are to work with. Everyone looks like the good guy. Lovable. Darling. Press included. Because c'mon, it's propaganda, a supply and demand, and we're all just doing our job. Can't we just admit it and make it easy for each other. Regardless of what side of the rope you walk on. Without us there is no you. Without you there is no us. Can't we all just get along?
March 20th, 2006Last Saturday we went out, expecting to have a typical Los Angeles, pretty people/expensive drinks night that you cannot leave LA without experiencing. But after sneaking into a Bold and the Beautiful party at the House of Blues on Sunset and getting jiggy with Hunter Tylo and Lorenzo Lamas, it ended up being one of those nights you think are oh-so-typical but really, truly aren't.
This is why LA rules. You just never know what's going to happen, expecially when you don't plan it yourself! |
We've never seriously considered getting a dog. Sure, we talk about it all the time, the same way we talk about hippos and monkeys, but we've always come to the conclusion that we really like our freedom. Then we saw the perfect puppy. She was at a shelter in Burbank, 7 weeks old, a mix of spaniel and something unknown. It was the first puppy that made us have a serious conversation about what our next ten years would look like. "We'd lose our ability to leave on unplanned trips." We never go on unplanned trips. "We couldn't travel." Well, yes we could. We'd just have to find a doggie hotel. "It's a lot of work." No doubt. So we thought about it....and thought about it....and decided to go get the puppy at 10am the following day. But some things just aren't meant to be. The puppy was raffled among the five of us who showed up and we didn't win. I'd seen her for 10 minutes, and the decision to get a dog was hasty to say the least, but I was devastated. At least temporarily. I thought of the little red blanket I can't sell on Ebay, and how the puppy wasn't going to need it. I wasn't going to send off an email to my friends and family saying we have a puppy named Hauva (yes, we were going to name it doggie). I wasn't going to wake up with a puppy in the house. It wasn't meant to be. But something good came out of not getting the puppy. We know we're ready. We know we want one - when it's the right time and the right puppy we have already made room in our minds. The rest we can get from Target. 
On Sunday night I covered the ABC All Star Party with cast members from LOST and Desp. Housew. and even a few Grey's Anatomy people. Because it's an insane week and everything was supposed to go smoothly I, of course, had a microphone mishap and spend a good 4 hours transcribing what sounded much like a Scottish football game. I freaked, got what I needed out of it, went to bed and slept for a good 3,5h. But it wasn't all for nothing. Here's me with Josh Holloway. The microphone may not have worked, but Debbie's camera did. I need a tan. 
ants. I have never seen so many celebrities in one place at one time, and I was expected to speak to every one of them. When I started doing red carpets in late 2005 I pretended that I had done millions of them, and somehow that seemed to work for me. This time I walked around chanting "Be Nancy O'Dell" in my head. I could never be Nancy O'Dell, but the chanting must have worked on some level as I will be doing my third press tour this spring. 